6 Ways to Stay in Your Power When You’re Going Through It
God, grant me the serenity… Sometimes it can feel like literally everything is stacked against you and you have zero control over your less-than-desirable circumstances. Surely it may seem like that’s the case and trust me, I’ve been right there in a stuck situation throwing every possible solution at the wall and nothing sticking except me in the mud.
But the lotus flower blooms from the mud. A lotus is a survivor. It rises from the dark muddy waters and finds the warmth and nourishment of the Light.
The spiritual path will take some of us lucky individuals into some very deep, dark gunk in order to die, to shed all the ego constructs that keep us from living in true alignment. Then, when it all feels like too much to bear, and enough is enough, you have no choice but to surrender to Divine Will which is actually one and the same as your own power.
And so comes the day that you throw out an old belief, you think a new thought or make a new move like writing a blog post for the first time in years.
Until you reawaken however, you must chill in the dark. And even though you might feel powerless, you actually do have control of some things. I’d like to remind you of six ways to stay in your power when you’re going through a tough time.
1) Eat well. Your body actually needs extra nourishment through stressful situations. Everything you consume contributes to how you feel, so choose foods and beverages that make you feel good! Eat lots of fresh, life-affirming fruits and vegetables. Don’t eat a ton of processed, lifeless stuff or drink too much alcohol or caffeine which could make you feel more anxious and depressed. You need energizing, uplifting nutrients. Cook your own food too, infusing it with extra Vitamin L(ove) from your own sweet heart. Even if you’re on a budget, this is totally doable. One time when I was really going through it, I was living on food stamps and I was still able to get affordable, organic food (thank you, Trader Joe’s). One of my favorite recipe blogs I get inspiration from is Plant Based on a Budget. Let thy food be thy medicine.
2) Curb/release addictions. When you’re going through it, it is so easy to seek and reach for a multitude of external things for relief, pleasure and validation. Addictions come in many forms - alcohol, drugs, food, porn, sex, shopping, the damn phone, other people, etc. Our culture is obsessed with chasing things outside of ourselves for happiness. There’s a lot to unpack because it’s definitely way deeper than the behavior or substance itself. We must look at the thoughts and traumas that prompt us to abandon ourselves. Full disclosure, one of my biggest “assignments” during my time in the mud was to release my marijuana addiction. I’ll be sharing a lot more about my journey but for now, what I can say is that my daily “habit” was keeping me powerless and holding me back from doing things I love like writing. Smoking weed became my default stress relief and blocked me from creating. (It actually opened my creativity but kept me from taking action). Breaking addictions is something I love helping people with, so if you’re struggling and need to talk to someone, connect with me for a free call.
3) Surround yourself with good energy. This one is so important because you really have to get clear on who in your life is holding consistent, positive, non-judgmental, unconditionally loving space for you. You will know by the way you feel when you’re around them. It was another of my assignments during this difficult time to discern between who really cares, honors my sensitivity and encourages me to keep sharing my gifts and those who project their judgments or harsh energy onto me. We’re all unconscious of our energy at times so this is a test to put some boundaries up if need be, even if temporarily. I’m beyond grateful for those who have stood by me through thick and thin. I’m a very loyal Scorpio so you either got my full appreciation for life or you’re cut lol. Spend quality time and cohabitate with people who always uplift you to your higher self!
4) Express yourself. No matter how low you go, keep writing, keep speaking, keep painting, keep running, keep coaching, keep teaching, keep dancing, keep singing, keep sharing, KEEP GOING. Of all the beautiful people in my life, I honestly don’t receive this message enough. (There are a couple out of the whole bunch that do encourage me often). We must remind each other when we’re down. So I’m telling YOU. This is how your inner child, your SOUL stays alive through tough times. You must do things that take your mind off frustrating circumstances and bring you joy. You are not your mind. You are not your circumstances. You are a spark of the Creator itself. We are creators! So open your channel and create, express and love. This is actually what will help your lotus to bloom when it’s time. While I don’t consider myself an amazing visual artist, I still get out the colors and play like with this Anxiety Relief Coloring Book for Adults. Keep splashing around in the mud, baby!
5) Breath and move. Tough times can make you feel so restricted and trapped. It’s imperative to move your body and breathe deeply as often as you consciously can. A muddy situation had me feeling so stuck with limited cash and no car. Yoga had been my main therapy for nearly two decades and I unfortunately didn’t even have easy access to a local studio. So I made due with short yet effective home practices, a lot of epic walks and solo dance sessions in my room with my headphones in and the volume UP. You gotta keep moving that energy so you don’t get too stagnant. Breathwork is also amazing. Many people love methods like Wim Hof which can personally be a bit too fast and aggressive for me. I like slow, methodical yogic breathing (and a bit a breath of fire) like this Morning Breathwork with Shamanic Drums on Insight Timer. Inhaaaale, exhaaaale…
6) Open up to Love. When you’re in the mud, you might just want to say Fuck You, God! Or worse. Maybe you go so low you start questioning the meaning of life, totally stop enjoying yourself and feel like giving up. I get it, been there too. The mind can be susceptible to morbid thoughts when you feel you have no control. But you do have the power to control your thoughts. It just takes the desire for a better life, the willingness to change and some conscious effort. One of my favorite teachers of all time is Louise Hay, the OG of self-love and the powerful affirmations. I recommend her classic book You Can Heal Your Life, it’s an essential read. By changing your thoughts and words, you can open yourself to possibilities and completely transform our lives. Simply by stating “Love is everywhere and I am loving and loveable” holds great truth and will help you open your heart and mind to that beautiful Divine Light, that of which truly already are.
As I emerged slowly from the mud, I could see the higher purpose of it all. I needed to go through it. Not that I “deserved” it but I realized it actually was a gift. Because I’m here to utilize my incredible sensitivity and empathy toward serving others, and I opened that level of empathy through suffering. My power is as deep as I feel and I learned to alchemize the pain into gold for myself and all lives I touch. I feel like it took forever to reawaken to my power but hey, it takes as long as it takes and learning to have compassion and patience for oneself is part of the process. I hope that the insights and tools I share will help you through yours.